Monday, October 19, 2009
Help Me Howard: Porn Granny
Let me lay this out: You are a grandmother, you live alone and suddenly you start getting billed for watching porn on your TV. First thing this grandmother did was laugh. Then, she found out they were not joking, and the satellite company didn't believe her when she said she was not a porn watcher. So how do you prove you did not watch something? Do like your friends do, call Help me Howard with Patrick Fraser.
WSVN -- I get to meet a lot of people with memorable characteristics. Marilyn's is her laugh.
Patrick Fraser: "You have a great sense of humor. You're always this happy?"
Marilyn Davis: "Yeah, just about."
Marilyn has such a great attitude, she can even laugh about her problem.
Patrick Fraser: "Do you watch porn?"
Marilyn Davis: "No, I don't watch porn. That's not one of my favorite pastimes."
But, according to her satellite provider, Marilyn's a porn addict.
Marilyn Davis: "OK, it says, 'Ecstasy,' 'Office Sex,' 'Naughty," "Shorties,' 'R&B Party,' 'Ecstasy' again. It's just a constant over and over, the same thing."
In one two-week span, Marilyn was billed for watching 12 porn flicks.
Marilyn Davis: "No, no, no."
According to her bill, Marilyn once watched two porn flicks at the same time.
Patrick Fraser: "You are addicted to porn?"
Marilyn Davis: "Yes, I am."
Even more amazing, Marilyn is able to watch porn during the day, while she is at work.
Marilyn Davis: "I don't understand how can I watch it when I'm not home."
She may not understand how she can be in two places at one time, but she can certainly read the bill for the dozen dirty movies.
Marilyn Davis: "$205, that's what it was, $205 for the first bill."
Marilyn can laugh about the porn bill because she lives alone, and when she does sit down to watch TV with a picture of Jesus behind her, it's often to watch a religious show.
Patrick Fraser: "So you look at pictures of Jesus on the cross and then you look at porn, right?"
Marilyn Davis: "Yeah, right, OK, and I say, 'God' forgive me, I'm watching a naughty movie.' No."
So Marilyn called the Dish Network and told them this grandmother was not dialing up porn movies.
Marilyn Davis: "They told me there was nothing they could do, and I know there is something they can do."
But satellite providers probably often hear from people who claim I didn't watch that porn, so, Howard, how can Marilyn prove she didn't punch up the porn?
Howard Finkelstein: "Just like in a criminal case, the best way to prove that you did not watch these movies is with an alibi. Marilyn was at work when the movies were viewed. She needs a time sheet or a co-worker to prove she was somewhere else and could not possibly have watched the movies."
When I called the Dish Network, they told me they would investigate. A few days later, I was told they were wiping the porn off of Marilyn's bill. When I asked how the charges got there, they told me they were looking into it. Their decision saved Marilyn from having to prove she didn't watch those movies.
Howard Finkelstein: "The burden is on the customer because it's your TV set that is hooked up to the cable or satellite, and therefore, the law will presume that it was someone in your home who watched it, and if someone outside steals your service, you would have to prove that."
Marilyn loves her Dish Network, and with this cleared up, she can now relax and watch her favorite shows again.
Marilyn Davis: "I am spastic over the outcome. I am so happy because God knows I do not watch porn."
Patrick Fraser: "In Marilyn's case, it seemed pretty clear she did not watch the porn, but in other cases how can you prove you didn't get a service? Let's say your power bill doubles, how do you prove you didn't use all that electricity? It's almost impossible. I mean, how do you prove you didn't use the electricity? You can't."
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