Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Parent to Parent: Spoiling
Do you find yourself giving in to your child's demands for toys or treats? Could your kids be spoiled? Seven's Lynn Martinez takes a look at the issue in tonight's Parent to Parent.
WSVN -- We all want our kids to be better off than we were.
Lorenzo Barrene: "It's very difficult not to spoil your kids."
Parents Lourdes and Lorenzo Barrene have three boys and a girl. Lorenzo admits he buys for the kids to make up for the time he's not there.
Lorenzo Barrene: "I feel guilty because I work all the time, so I spoil them all the time."
And the kids have everything, video games, toys, but Lourdes worries they don't appreciate it.
Lourdes Barrene: "I don't think that they appreciate what they have because it comes kind of easy to them. If they get a new game for their game system of any sort, and it gets lost, there is no effort in looking for it because they assume it's going to be replaced by something else or another one."
Seven's parenting expert Dr. Valerie Goode says it's easy to get into a habit of buying, buying and buying for your kids.
Dr. Valerie Goode: "Yes, they're adorable, and you want to give them everything, but it really doesn't do them any good, and they know it too."
Dr. Valerie says spoiling a child can lead to problems down the road.
Dr. Valerie Goode: "They're going to think that everything should come their way. So the first time they receive an F, they're going to come to you, and they're going to want you to get them out of it."
So what do you do first? Set ground rules for your kids about what you are going to buy and when, and, warning up front for all you parents, the kids are going to fight it.
Dr. Valerie Goode: "Let them cry, but don't give in. If you keep giving in, they're going to get better at their temper tantrums, so you don't want to keep giving in."
Next, this is a big one, let them know if something gets lost or broken it's gone and not replaced.
Dr. Valerie Goode: "If something breaks, you don't run out and buy something brand new. It doesn't make any sense to do that."
Finally, give your child the one thing they want more than anything else, time with you.
Lorenzo Barrene: "We have three sons, and you try to do the best for them."
Lynn Martinez: "Dr. Valerie says a good indicator that your kids are spoiled is that other kids don't want to play with them because they don't share."
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