Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Parent to Parent: Jealousy
Any mom or dad knows that parenting is all a juggling act. And when you have more then one child, it's all about splitting time between the children. But in tonight's Parent to Parent, we found there are ways to solve even the earliest sibling rivalry.
WSVN--This past year has been a busy one for the Feinberg family. Mom Cece already runs her own PR firm, and now has not one, but two children with the recent addition of three month old Vivienne. But for big brother Max, the change has been, let's say, a challenge.
Cece Feinberg: "Max is the first grandchild in both families and he has gotten so much attention from the very day that he was born. I think to share the limelight has been very difficult for him."
So difficult - Max tends to take out his frustration on the baby.
Cece Feinberg: "Ever since we've had a new baby he has really been acting up. He has started to hit her."
7 Parenting Expert Dr. Sally says it's perfectly fine for an older child to react this way -- to be jealous or angry with a new baby. But to prevent this from happening, make sure you talk to your older son or daughter before the baby's arrival.
7 Parenting Expert Dr. Sally Goldberg: "Prepare your child ahead of the likelihood of seeing the baby in the mom's arms and explaining to the baby that the mother is the most important person in the baby's life."
You can do that by showing your older child photo albums of when they were a baby. And explain to them their new sibling is there to add to the family.
Dr. Sally Goldberg: "This is a wonderful time to emphasis the role of the big brother or the big sister and all the wonderful things he can do in that role."
Give your older child responsibility by involving them in changing or feeding. Then make sure to thank them for their help.
Dr. Sally Goldberg: "Thank you is your magic word, thank you shows appreciation."
But above all else, Dr. Sally says the most important advice to is to make sure to give your older child plenty of attention, especially if they're under age two.
Dr. Sally Goldberg: "Before you're going to feed the baby, if you could build into your time a time to read to, sing to, or just cuddle and talk to your older child."
Cece's trying to fit extra playtime for Max into her busy schedule. In the meantime, she's hoping big brother will welcome Vivi into the family soon.
Cece Feinberg: "I'm looking forward to the time when the kids play together. I think that's really fun family photo."
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