Friday, February 3, 2006
7 News Features: Carriage Before Marriage
They are mommies of the millenium. From angelina joile to katie holmes, thousands of women are purposely choosing to be pregnant without being married. But in tonight's Special Assignment report, 7's Lynn Martinez shows us why choosing the carriage before marriage isn't always best for the baby.
WSVN--"Tom and Katie sitting in the tree..."
It used to be a rhyme little girls chimed...
"First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage."
But today, the 'carriage' ... Often comes before 'marriage'!
Parenting Expert: "I think that it's a multitude of reasons Finding the right person, the right time and the biological clocks are ticking."
Now in her 40's--Karen Paquett feels like she almost has it all.
Karen Paquette: "I have a great career, I have a great house. I have a stable income. The only thing missing is a child."
Forget finding Mr. Right.
Karen doesn't want to wait to meet him, get married and have a child - she wants to adopt immediately.
Karen Paquette: "Some people think to be a good parent there has to be a man that there has to be a mother and a father which I totally disagree with."
And Karen's not alone.
Parenting experts know the traditional family is no longer a typical family.
Dr. Robert Siudmak: "The national statistics show that one out of 3 women are having babies without being married. It does seem to be a trend."
What experts don't know is how this trend will play out.
While it is possible to successfully raise children as a single mom, they warn women should first factor in what will be best for the child.
Dr. Robert Siudmak:: "Statistics show that in fatherless families there is an increase for risk of juvenile crime, an increase of teenage pregnancy and childhood drug abuse and high school dropouts."
Parenting Expert: "You have to have your financial support in place. You have to have childcare issues in place if you're going to go back to work and making sure you're child has all the love and attention that they deserve."
But single women aren't alone.
Some couples are choosing a connection through conception.
They want to be moms and dads before being husbands and wives.
Wendy Bucciarelli: "We have more between us than many married couples, you know just the love and commitment."
Together for three years, Dennis and Wendy have a baby girl on the way.
Their plan--baby first-marriage later.
Dennis Derje: "We just happen to have that security between us."
Unfortunately, that security doesn't work for everybody.
Dr. Roni Cohen Leiderman: "Because as challenging as a relationship is, it's even more so when a baby comes into the family."
Dennis Derje: "I know no matter what, we'll be together, we'll have a loving environment for our daughter."
As for Karen, she's still looking to adopt.
Karen Paquette: "I absolutely see myself with a child. Maybe there will be a man in my life. I don't know. I do not count on it."
Unfortunately for Karen, the reason she's been turned away is because most agencies prefer married couples over someone who's single.
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